Reason to Forgive
by LuffyMarra
Summary: Can Zevran forgive his warden?


A/N This is an m/m story between my elf blood mage and Zevran. Don't like, don't read. This was betaed by the awesome vabvioand.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but Laris, everything else is bioware's.

Zevran looked around his room with a sigh. Alistair had given the whole group their own private rooms for the coming coronation/wedding, but instead of enjoying the luxury of having his own bed, he was actually feeling a bit lonely. Snorting, Zevran reminded hisself that he was an assassin and he should be used to being alone, that it was the way his life had always been, only…

He wasn't use to it anymore! He had grown used to having companions that would watch his back without him having to worry that they were about to stab him. He suddenly realized that he had come to find comfort in hearing Oghren's snores, Leliana's soft singing, Alistair and Wynne soft talking, Striker's barking, and then, there was Laris.

Laris…How the very thought of the elf mage made something in Zevran's chest ache! When Zevran had first seen the younger brown-haired elf, he had not seemed like anything special, but then Zevran found himself soundly beaten and then spared. Over the course of their travels, Zevran had seen a very different side to the other elf, and before he knew it, Zevran was surprised to find himself in deep with the Warden.

He had fought the feeling at first because everything he had learned in the Crows told him it was wrong. Very wrong. He had quickly discovered that he didn't cared, that he wanted more of this feeling, then without any warning, everything changed. Laris suddenly started to pay more attention to Morrigan and spend less time with him. They didn't talk like they used to, Laris didn't take him on missions like he once did, and their love life had come nearly to a stop. After he caught the other two kissing and Morrigan began to throw around very thinly veiled insults, Zevran pulled Laris away from camp and demanded an explanation, only to be surprised when his back was slammed into a tree and his mouth captured in a searing kiss. A little overwhelmed by the passion behind it (something he had missed more than he was willing to admit) Zevran could only hold onto the other elf and try to match Laris passion with his own. 

"My poor Zevran." Laris whispered as he pulled back from the kiss. "My assassin, my protector, I know this must be very confusing for you. Believe me when I say that I have missed being with you more than you will accept at this point, but what I am trying to accomplish is too important for me to stop now. Please be patient. I promise that once the war is over, I will explain everything to you. Can you do that for me, my assassin?" Laris asked as he threaded his fingers into Zevran's hair. 

"Mi Amor," groaned Zevran as he leaned into the mage's crass. "I will try to be patient, but you must give me something to tide me over." 

The pleased smile that Zevran received made something warm fill his chest, and the memory of that night's activities became his only shield between Morrigan's words and his heart. 

Shaking his head to bring it back to the present, Zevran could only wonder how much longer he would have to wait for Laris' explanation. The Archdemon was dead, the war won, Alistair would soon be king with Anora as his queen, and the Circle of Magi was on the path to ruling itself. What more was the mage waiting for? Or could his words have been just empty promises to get Zevran out of the way? 

Just as Zevran's thoughts were travelling down a dark road, he felt two arms wrapping around him. One went around his chest and trapped his arms to his sides; the other went around his shoulders, a hand coming to rest gently on his neck. Zevran didn't bother to fight back; he knew this touch, the feel of the other body now pressed to his, the smell that surrounded him.

"Mi Amor." Zevran breathed as his head fell back onto the shoulder behind him.

"My Zevran." Laris exhaled against his ear, before gentle, teasing kisses were trailed down his throat. "How I have missed having you in my arms. It was nearly unbearable to be so close, but unable to touch you."

For a moment, Zevran basked in the feeling of being in the blood mage's arms once more. The moment was ruined, however, when the memory of seeing Morrigan entering Laris' room and the noises he heard after came to his mind, causing him to stiffen and raise his head.

"Laris." Zevran felt the other elf stopping and humming in acknowledgment. "I think it is time we talk. I saw Morrigan entering your room, and I heard the sounds after. If there is to be _anything_ between us, I need to know why…no, how. How could you do such a thing?"

Zevran mourned the loss of Laris' warmth as he pulled away from him, but as the other elf stepped in front of him, he was surprised to find a look of tenderness in the mage's brown eyes.

"My assassin, my faithful protector, I do believe it is time I tell you everything. After all you have been very patient, so I shall give you an explanation now; afterwards, if I satisfied your curiosity, perhaps we can find something far more enjoyable to do. Does this sound agreeable to you?"

Zevran could only nod in agreement as the smoldering look in Laris' eyes briefly stole his voice. Humming in satisfaction, Laris reached out and, taking Zevran's hand, led him over to the couch in front of the cold fireplace. A flick of his free hand had the fire roaring to life and, letting go of the assassin's hand, Laris sat down with his back against the armrest. Not wanting to be too distracted during their talk, Zevran sat at the other end, an expectant look on his face.

"Tell me, Zevran," Laris started, an amused look playing across his face. "Do you think I am foolish?"

Zevran took a moment to think over his time with Laris before he answered.

"I must admit the only time I have ever thought that you were a fool was the day you allowed a devilishly handsome assassin to live and join your little group, though I did change my mind after we had come to know each other better. Anyone that can constantly fool everyone into thinking you were just a harmless little mage should never be called a fool."

"Ahh, my Zevran." Laris sighed, a pleased look now showing on his face. "That commonsense is one of the many reasons I wanted to win you without the help of my blood magic. Morrigan and almost everyone else could never see fully through my mask. Did you know that she never realized I had read _both_ of her mother's grimoires? I am a mage that was not only trying to remain free, but also win a war and yet not once did it cross her mind that I would look through those books. Such a stupid, stupid woman…"

Zevran made a sound of agreement, taking great pleasure in hearing his mage degrading the witch in such a way.

"But you did read both, yes? I believe I saw you looking through one while we were freeing the Circle."

"Hmm...Oh yes. There was such knowledge and power in those books, but it was the first book which I realized would help me accomplish one of my goals: to talk to Flemeth once more. That is the reason I took Alistair, Leliana, and Oghren with me when I went to confront her. I could place them in a trance and talk to her for as long as I wished. The knowledge I gained from that talk… I still get shivers just thinking about it."

Zevran found himself moving closer to Laris to take a better look at the enraptured look that was now adorning his face. When he realized that Laris' eyes were open and were now fixed on him, Zevran cleared his throat and settled back against the couch, though he didn't bother to move away.

"I must admit, I had wondered why you did not take me with you. It was rather annoying being left at the camp. I take it that you lied to Morrigan about her mother being dead?"

"Forgive me; I thought that you would have more fun annoying Wynne, Bodahn, and the others than watching me discuss magic with the old hag. Once I had put the others in a trance, you wouldn't have been able to bother them like you used to and would have found it quiet boring. You are also correct in thinking that Flemeth still lives. I cannot wait to see what she planned for her wayward daughter."

Zevran made a pleased sound before falling silent once more. Seeing that the assassin wanted more, Laris sighed and decided to get to the main point.

"Tell me, Zevran, do you know why it must be a Grey Warden that kills an Archdemon?"

Zevran shook his head, a look of confusion crossing his face.

"It's something Riordan told Alistair and me about the night before we left Redcliffe; it must be a Grey Warden because the taint in our blood allows the Archdemon's spirit to enter us at the moment of death, but in doing so it kills both the warden and the demon."

"_What?!_" Zevran shouted in horror as he turned to fully face Laris and reaching up to cup the other's face, he allowed his figures to brush over the earring in the mage's ear. "But how can that be true? You are sitting here with me. You did not fall on the battlefield!"

Leaning into the hand on his cheek, Laris smirked at Zevran before reaching up and taking the assassin's hand into his.

"That would be because I read about this little condition of the warden's in the old hag's book. I also found the ritual that would allow me to live inside, but it required that Morrigan preformed it on her own free will, which means I could not force her to do it with my blood magic. Now do you finally understand why I began to pursue her?" Laris asked as he pulled away from Zevran and started to curl into himself.

"Besides the fact that I did not want to die for this Maker forsaken country, I also could not allow Alistair to die. Ever since I learned who his father was, I have been planning to put him on the throne. With the rulers of Ferelden in my control, I could free the Circle and they would never have to fear the punishment of a Templar again. I could get Alistair to find my phylactery and destroy it, than I would never have to fear the Templars being able to find me again. After all if they found out about my research, the things I've done and people I can control, they wouldn't just kill me, they would…they…it would happen again…I couldn't stand for them to touch…"

"They would never touch you!" Zevran cried, as he straddled Laris' lap and grabbed his face with both hands. "I would kill anyone who tries to take you away from me."

Zevran was pleased to see the hysteria that had been entering Laris' eyes vanish and a gentle smile taking its place.

"You would, wouldn't you, my Protector?" Laris asked in wonder as his arms wrapped around Zevran's waist and pulled him closer so that he could bury his face into the assassin's neck. Zevran merely sat there and allowed Laris the time he needed to pull himself together. Several minutes later, Laris pulled away slightly and nuzzled into Zevran's jaw.

"So my Assassin, am I forgiven for having to pursue the woman?"

"Will you ever go after her?"

"Never, my Zevran. Everything I want is right here." Laris answered before he pulled the assassin's head down and gently kissed him, causing Zevran to let out a quiet moan before he pulled back.

"I may need a little more convincing, Mi Amor, but I think that it might be possible."

Smirking in reply, Laris tightened his hold and pulled Zevran down for another kiss.


End file.
